How to find Slenderman.

Today in English we had to write a how to paper. I wrote this.

Slenderman is a very powerful, elusive creature and to find him you will need to prepare and be ready. In the following I will tell you how to find Slenderman and keep him at bay long enough to do whatever you want to do with him, whether it be take pictures or revel in the awesomeness of finding SLENDERMAN, you’re going to need some help, and that’s where I come in. But be warned, once he starts following you, there’s no way out.

First, you’re going to need a camera. Research shows Slenderman is attracted to cameras and aspiring film students. To attract Slenderman you’re going to need to become a film major. Make very bad short films, and name them generic cliche names. This may not make a bunch of sense at the moment, but it will.

Second, get into hiking, preferably shirtless. Hiking in the woods and forest areas is a great idea for attracting Slenderman, as he tends to hang out there a lot. If there are mountains in the area hike them shirtless, but if not it’s not really a needed part as that isn’t canon.

Third, post videos your friend gave you on YouTube. He told you not to, but just do it anyway. What’s the worst that can happen? Try to name the channel something short and introspective. If you’re having trouble try this formula for coming up with a name.

Animal + Rock Type = Name!

Trust me, this works.

And lastly, realize this is all your fault. For when you uploaded the tapes, and continued to pursue them you invited him in. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.